PRIDE? Sneaky Pride? Accidental Pride? Yes.
I finally repent....In recent years, God is really opening my eyes about my personal character weaknesses, and sin patterns. Once again He revealed something new to me. Another sin. Uh0oh. Sorry God. Now I need help again. This one is kind of a biggie. I have lived with it for SO LONG....It has to do with subtle pride, sneaky pride, that manifested rather than in an abundance of confidence or conviction to not budge in position of steps.... this pride manifested in SCORN. Light-hearted TOP-HATTED-ness or secret disrespect or disdain....honestly rooted in bitterness or unforgiveness from interactions in the past.
I had allowed those roots to grow. Even for root bulbs to multiply...and when in privacy, I would allow myself to dig some bulbs up, and toss them around playfully with someone close to me. He also laughed.
Thank you to God for opening my eyes to the SIN of my scornful ways...I will not dig up these bulbs and toss them around in fun and jest anymore. I see my sin. When I get the urge to dig up those bulbs... I will go to You and ask for healing, and help...
I repent. I seek forgiveness. I seek to grow FORGIVENESS and GRACE and Christlike LOVE from the power and blessing of the Holy Spirit. I aim for this, even towards this person... or anyone. Only in YOU through Jesus Christ, may have HOPE...
My friend Carla, shared a version of the sing, DUST IN THE WIND this morning. I thought, "It somehow fits..."
May I be moved to compassion and away from scorn, by remembering that so much of the path of humanity is shared...
Genesis 3:19
for dust thou art, and unto dust shalt thou return.
I think it appropriate, that I share, it was this sister's blog post that really opened my heart to investigate the meaning of scornful, and to self reflect.
Thank you for sharing some journey with me. What is God doing in your heart these days?
I think it a kindness, Tammy, that you share this very real and honest post here today. Who knows who else might be struggling with something, and this is the real-ness it takes to bring contemplation? I often pray, as David did, "search my heart, O God" so that He can reveal to me if there is anything in there that's not pleasing to Him, or anything that might someone mar His good Name and Character. Praise God that we can edify and uplift one another in word, deed, and prayer. I believe it truly makes a difference! Praise God!
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